05 September, 2022

Wood Lake, Erskine, MN 56535

Warning:  I might be becoming a Minnesota Lake Person.

Hammock naps

Kittyboy

S'more eating

Sunshine Joy

Campfire

Lake side friends

Canoe ride

Apricot cleanse





















Fish bites

Cool nights

Best ever-

Northern Lights






23 July, 2022

Alaskan Troll

There are strange things done in the midnight sun, By women searching for Trolls
When I found myself out and about, on Creek Street taking a stroll

Taking in the art, the breeze from the sea, then suddenly he appears.
Ray himself, guitar in tow, where he lives in the last frontier.


I have long wanted to meet the amazing artist, Ray Troll. Today was my lucky day!

Thanks so much @ray.troll for the history talk, the art discussion. It was a privilege.

Coincidentally we also bumped into Eric‘s cousin!
Marie Loveless

What a great day in Ketchikan.



19 July, 2022

Wood Lake, Minnesota

 Canoe the lake

Watch for fish

Talk to my boyf

Make a wish


Take in the sky

Love the land

Soak in the water

Now, THIS is grand.

Found a little place by the lake- I think I'll spend more time there.


08 June, 2022

Farewell My Beloved

 I am an unabashed Cat Person.  And I love deeply and profoundly.

The loss of my dear cat is tremendous to me.

George.  King George.  Curious George. Boy George.  I will love you always. 


The gift of loving and adoring him has been an absolute privilege.  A privilege that is not lost on me.  I am grateful for every second I got to spend holding and loving him.  When the things that you live for die, the pain is profound.  Loss.  Deep heart sobs.  Again, I know sorrow.  Again I must try to pick myself up. 

 

I received word that he died while I was in Washington, then as I began my journey home on I-90 I happened across a horrific accident that had just occurred. A young man lay in the middle of the interstate bloody and crying.  I pulled over and rushed to him.   Eric, who was traveling in the car behind me laid out his (extensive) first aid kit (he is ever prepared) then he went to direct traffic and put up caution cones.  I was told the ambulance may take up to an hour in that remote part of Montana. 

 

I knelt beside this young man to comfort and support. Holding gauze pads to his head laceration to slow the bleeding.  He was in shock and only partially coherent.  I asked his name he replied:

“Gabriel”. 

Now covered in blood holding his head, I somehow remained composed, and slowly and softly repeating:

 

“Gabriel, I am here to help you, hold still.  I am here.  My name is Heidi, I am here to help”.

 

Gabriel had severe head trauma- and perhaps other injuries as well. 

 

Just like my George.  I pray that Gabriel does not succumb to his injuries.  And what a privilege it would be to meet him someday. 

Alice taught me this week to be: Open, Curious, Slow and Kind.

 

Tonight at sunset under the lilacs-  at the place of our last memory together I will bury my George.  Heaven help me, because I need it.

 

My whole family is in Idaho, I will do this alone.  

 

I am so grateful for the love of my dear friends near and far these last few days.   Shelby Barentine, Jamie Sebby, Kandis Larson,  Karie Lee, Heidi Hampe, Carol Simmons, RaeAnne Anderson and Eric Castle  I love you all deeply and profoundly.


06 June, 2022

Unwelcome- Death has visited



Grief is the price of love.

Those who know me,  know that I ABSOLUTELY ADORE my cats.

I have been away, without reception for about a week. 
As soon as I came into reception I received the message that my beloved George was hit by a car and died. Pain profound. 

I can't write more right now, I am leaning into the sadness, the grief.  It is hard work.  

King George
Boy George
Curious George
Georgy Boy
Fat Head
Best Cuddle buddy ever-  You have my heart.  You are sorely missed.

































One of the last special moments I spent with George was out in the garden.  The sun was setting - I was watering and appreciating his beauty under the lilacs.
I will bury him there tonight before sunset.




 I harvested sweetgrass and lilacs this morning and dug the hole for his nest.

24 May, 2022

Happy Birthday.


 Some days I struggle to find gratitude. You would be 10 years old today my girl.


Still, I am thankful for the powerful impact you’ve had on my life, even in the short time you were here.

I miss you.
Every. Single. Day.

Love, Mama

03 May, 2022

Rainbows and Funerals

 I feel raw this time of year.

The sunlight pouring in this morning cast a beautiful prism rainbow across her picture, in a way I had never seen.


A little gift for my soul.  


Today’s morning light was remarkably similar to the morning light 8 years ago today, the day my life was forever changed.


On Sunday, our dear friend and neighbor Dick Taylor died.  We were blessed to have one last visit.  His breath was labored, his brow furrowed, yet there was a powerful peace in his home.  Ruby held one of his hands and I held the other, the love present was visceral.  He adored Ruby, and we ALL adored him. 


As I was leaving I caught a glimpse of Lizzy's photo on his fridge. Be still my heart.

When Ruby was in second grade she wanted to tell Dick all about her baby sister and she gave him a photo. He has kept it there all these years.


A few hours later, I was again blessed to attend him briefly after he died.  His brow now smooth, his body no longer struggling.  Peace persisted.  


A wonderful neighbor and even better friend- You will be so missed Dick. https://www.amundsonfuneralhome.com/obituary/richard-taylor


Transitions into and out of our body are sacred.  

Tethered by our breath

We live.


Mourning Whales & Morning Wails

Today marks day 13 of Tahlequah, carrying the lifeless body of her new calf, born on Christmas Eve. Again she grieves. Tahlequah, an endan...