Everything is different,   Nothing has changed

He is still wearing wool.

I continue to be very serious, all the time.

And I still can’t get enough of that smile.

 

This human journey has not been easy.

The path so rugged at times I didn’t think I could go on,

Grasping at roots to pull myself back to the trail.

Yet the view from the mountain peaks has been absolutely spectacular.



We understand sadness, we’re well acquainted with fear, and we know pain profound.


AND We also know unfathomed joy and momentous pure love.

The journey toward beauty and light is not easy. I don't expect it to be. I am just grateful to share all of these human experiences with Eric @ridetoalaska

 
“Life is a balance of light and dark. Happiness comes not from being attached to the good days and dreading the bad days, but by accepting that both are a part of life and have an important role”. -Bronnie Ware

911

Many years ago someone said to me: 

“I’ve never called 9-1-1. The kind of people that call 911 seem like needy parasite types”.


And I wondered:  Wouldn’t it be nice to live such a posh life that all my needs were met, that my health care was never in danger,  that I was always physically safe?

It takes a lot of grit to call 9-1-1.  It is frightening. There were many times I took a beating to avoid calling.   

So what kind of people call 911?  This kind of person. Me.

I called 911. . .

*When my ex husband tried to strangle me.

*When my landlord shot my cat.

*Last year when in the wee hours of the morning I heard men chanting “White Power” from a nearby rooftop.

*And lastly, when I went to wake up my baby girl and realized that she was dead.



All of these experiences have shaped who I am and helped me to relate to people in unexpected ways. It has also put me in a position where some people can't relate to me. But, even with all I've been through, I still carry so much privilege.

I may be impulsive, flighty, and I still struggle when I have to hold still for long periods of time (you know like 10 minutes). For years I shamed myself for these traits. Not anymore.  No shame.

Because dammit, I have a lot to offer and  I’ve got GRIT.

Belonging

I am different

I don't belong

It's a different plane
That I'm on

Back in time

I squeezed and contorted
Pouring myself
In a mold to be thwarted

Some people march
To a different sound
And we have great value
And love profound

Nowadays
I sing my own song
And long for the places
Where I always belong

Falling upward
Passing through fear
I am a safe place
You belong here!

Lost in the Desert

 

Run in the desert

With all the  cacti

So many trails

To our fate belie

Coyotes howl

We're 2 miles in

The sun feels so nice

Let's just keep runnin

We're not lost

I remember that saguaro

And that one, and that one

Which way pointed the aarow?

Retracking our prints

In the Sonoran sand

Bushwhacking cacti

Events unplanned

In the wilderness

Skills to the test

Women be problem solving

No need to digress

We made it back safely

Adventure had we

Thank you Tucson

Girls desert glee